Beyond All Recognition
by The Great Kelly The Great
Summary: Hermione is a Death Eater. She has lost all sense of love, all things that connected her to the places and people she once knew. She has changed beyond all recognition. An author's note: This fic is just a short little anst-y thing. Rated PG-13 just in


Disclaimer: Hi, I work at Bloomsbury Books and at Scholastic. I am here to tell you that Miss Joanne K. Rowling has decided to sell all her possessions and move to a cabin without electricity in the woods somewhere. She has sold all the Harry Potter characters to a belle named The Great Kelly The Great, a blonde British wanna-be, who owns many thousand schnauzers (one of which is named Italics) and will be a vet and author when she grows up. This belle and Harry Potter are now engaged. Thank you.  
  
Fine, don't believe me? If you find that a little far-fetched, I will give you something else to believe. NEWSFLASH!!! J.K. Rowling has been keeping all the Harry Potter characters in her house, so she can interview them about Hogwarts. Last night, a young girl, about 13 years old, broke into her house and smuggled them back to the USA. If you have seen any blondes writing illegal fanfiction recently, please report it to your local police.  
  
I DO NOT OWN A THING!!!!!!!!!! ARE YOU HAPPY????????????????? I have almost taken up an entire page in Microsoft Word for my DISCLAIMER, for God's sake!  
  
A/N: Ok, I apologize for that rather odd disclaimer; I was possessed by a rabid hamster. Ok, please R&R, enjoy, tell me what you think. BYE!  
  
Beyond All Recognition  
  
I had to get out, I had to escape. I was trapped, hostage, drowning. And it was all in my own mind.  
  
Vaguely I thought I was going crazy, but my mind rejected the idea.  
  
My life went to pieces once I was drafted. I thought that if I agreed, I would be able to save the people I grew up with, cared so much about. For Voldemort was powerful, too powerful.  
  
I thought I agreed because I didn't want to see Harry or Ron die, or be injured, but I did for more selfish reasons. I was scared. I didn't want to die. Everyone else was ready to fight for the death of Voldemort, but I wasn't ready, I couldn't.  
  
I don't know what made me do it, but I became a Death Eater for Lord Voldemort.  
  
I still remember the letter, the one that told me I had been Chosen.  
  
To Miss Hermione Granger,  
  
You have been Chosen as a possible Death Eater for Lord Voldemort. Be in the Forbidden Forest on the Hogwarts grounds at midnight on Saturday the 17th, or die. Breathe a word of this to anyone, and you will be killed instantly.  
  
  
  
I was scared. I didn't want to die, so I went. They told me what would happen if I refused, they told me thousands of things that were common knowledge to Death Eaters.  
  
I was given the choice. Death, or Death Eater.  
  
Maybe I could save all the people I loved and cared about: Ron, Harry, Dean, Seamus, Neville, heck, even Parvati and Lavender. I knew what I had to choose.  
  
"I, Hermione Vivian Rebecca Granger, choose to be, forever more, a Death Eater serving Lord Voldemort."  
  
The Dark Mark was branded on my arm. I was pulled out of Hogwarts, right before Graduation, the night of my Graduation. I was taught hundreds, thousands, of illegal spells. I became Voldemort's minion.  
  
And I learned to hate. I performed countless murders, over half with Avada Kedavra, I forced people to under the Imperious Curse, and helped cause the deaths of eleven others.  
  
Hate became part of my nature. I was as ruthless as Lucius Malfoy, and a better servant than many other Death Eaters. I became almost a pet to Lord Voldemort, my master. I was his best, he valued my opinions more.  
  
Then, the night of my downfall came. I was sent to Hogwarts, a solitary mission, sent to kill McGonagall. I no longer cared about her, though at Hogwarts she had been a great friend and mentor. I no longer knew the word "friend."  
  
I Apparated into the forest, wand drawn. And standing before me was Harry, my best friend.  
  
"Harry?" I asked, scared out of my mind.  
  
"Hermione?" he asked, and started. "Where have you been the last year?" His voice was astonished. "We didn't have any idea what happened to you. We thought you had been killed."  
  
"I…I…I…." I had nothing to say. I couldn't explain to him. Feelings were rushing back. Memories, things I hadn't remembered in forever, though I hadn't been Chosen that long ago.  
  
"Hermione? What's different about you? The way you stand, act, your face is…different."  
  
I had to tell him. I had to kill him. I had to. My position as a Death Eater, the most important thing to me at the time, depended on it.  
  
But I remembered something. Something that had taken place in the giant castle standing majestically behind Harry, bathed in moonlight. Something I had long forgotten but had affected more than I could have known.  
  
  
  
Harry entered the common room. His face was red, mainly from all the attention. He had just won the Quidditch game for Gryffindor, and no one would leave him alone.  
  
I was sitting alone at a table in the corner of the Gryffindor common room. I had attended the match, but I really didn't want to attach myself to Harry, like a simpering star struck schoolgirl.  
  
Flocking Harry were many people he cared about, and other's he didn't even know: Ron, who was about the only other person besides me who's company he could stand; Fred and George, who were practically re-creating the entire game with their verbal replays; Colin and Dennis Creevey, who were about ready to serve Harry as servants; Ginny Weasley, who still felt embarrassed around Harry, though she had gotten over her crush; Cho Chang, who wasn't even in Gryffindor, but got whatever she wanted anyway.  
  
Cho Chang was a total slut, and everyone knew it. I knew it, and I hated her. She had been trying to get Harry Potter for a year, but he wouldn't even talk to her, no matter how much she flattered. He didn't live in total oblivion; he too knew she was a slut.  
  
"Please, everyone, just leave me alone," Harry begged. He had been asking for more solitude ever since the end of his fourth year. He wasn't as comfortable around people, excepting me, Ron, the rest of the Weasleys, Sirius and Hagrid.  
  
Harry's pleas went ignored. People were too full of happiness and Butterbeer to listen to him. They wanted to stay, even the ones who were in other Houses.  
  
I waved Harry over to the table I was sitting at in the corner. He gratefully pushed his way through the crowd and sat down.  
  
"Are you okay?" I asked. "Why is everyone surrounding you?" I truly did want to know. I had never really figured out why Harry was something of a god in Hogwarts.  
  
"I have no idea," Harry sighed. "It's like I am some sort of…I dunno, a saint. Everything I do is everyone else's business, it seems like. And I can't get rid of Cho Chang. She has been following me for a year now. And," he leaned closer, whispering now, as if he was telling me a huge secret. "I hate that girl."  
  
I laughed. "I can't blame you," I said. "That girl's going to grow up to be a prostitute, I swear."  
  
Harry leaned back and closed his eyes. "I never get any peace," he said. "You are the only person I can talk to, Hermione."  
  
This surprised me. I had always thought that Harry would go to Ron first, then me, if he really needed an opinion. My best friend might have been Harry, but wasn't his Ron?  
  
"What do you mean?" I asked, curious.  
  
"Ron is a best friend, but you are the person I can really talk to," Harry said. "You were the first person I told outside of Dumbledore and Sirius about the third task."  
  
"You didn't tell Ron first?"  
  
"No, because he isn't used to talking to people who are under strain, and feeling all depressed, and…well, you know what I mean. You I can talk to, and you make me feel…like it really wasn't my fault Cedric died."  
  
"It wasn't your fault, Harry," I said, for the thousandth time.  
  
"I know. You were the one who told me and made me believe it."  
  
And Harry leaned forward, smiling slightly. And his lips brushed mine. Then he kissed me, making me feel like I had floated to heaven. I never wanted to end that kiss.  
  
In the background someone whistled, and Fred and George set off a couple Filibuster Fireworks.  
  
And that was my first kiss, with my lifetime love, Harry Potter, amongst my best friends and foes, fireworks raining color down on Harry and me.  
  
Then I was transported back to the Forbidden Forest.  
  
"I…I…oh, Harry."  
  
"Hermione, you left right before Graduation. You left the night of Graduation. Nothing could have made you leave except…." He trailed off, mid-sentence.  
  
"That's it!" he said, after a few seconds in which I stood helplessly, wand still drawn. "You told me the night of Graduation, down in the common room, that you loved me, and…what was it? That you wanted me to know that if I never saw you again, it was because my or Ron's life was in danger. I puzzled over that for ages, because of course, you did disappear. I thought you had been kidnapped, you ran away, joined the muggle world, moved away. Thousands of things I imagined you going through. But Hermione…I know what you are. You're a Death Eater."  
  
My knees gave out. I saw what I was, a failure. I wasn't doing what I truly cared about.  
  
I started sobbing.  
  
"Come back, Hermione," Harry pleaded. "We'll welcome you back. You can, you know. We'll protect you, anything you want."  
  
"I…I can't, Harry," I sobbed. "I can't. And when they find I was with you, they will make me kill you, then they will kill me. I have to kill you."  
  
"Hermione. Look at me." Harry sounded stubborn, using that voice he used to exasperate me beyond reason with. Only he could get my temper flaring.  
  
When I didn't look at him, he put his hand under my chin and lifted my head up, so I was looking at him through my tears.  
  
"You can go ahead and kill me," he said, using the voice I knew and loved. "But let me say this first. I knew you before you became Hermione Granger, Death Eater and serial killer. I knew you. This isn't you. You are still the Hermione I love and care about. You have been pretending to hate for so long, that it has been eating away at you. You can go ahead and kill me, but know that someone does love you."  
  
I nodded, still crying. I knew what I had to do.  
  
"Harry, I love you too. I always have. You mean more to me than anything in the world. Almost. Once a Death Eater, always a Death Eater, and I will serve Lord Voldemort for my entire life. I am sorry I left you, but it was for the best. I will miss you. My love and goodbye to you."  
  
He nodded. He knew I had to do this.  
  
I raised my wand and closed my eyes. I hated killing, though it was now part of my nature.  
  
"Avada Kedavra," I whispered.  
  
A blast of green light blew out into the clearing and hit Harry, my beloved. He was dead instantly.  
  
"Goodbye Harry," I said. "You were been the best friend I ever had."  
  
Right now I am sitting on a log in the Forbidden Forest, thinking about how insane I am. I am going crazy; I have been ever since I was drafted into the Death Eaters.  
  
I just an I loved more than anything, just for my position. I am going crazy.  
  
I have reached my final decision. I am going to ; I am going to be with Harry. I need to be with him, hopefully up there in heaven, if the good Lord finds it in him to forgive me for my sins. My terrible sins. I have committed dozens of murders; can I still get into heaven?  
  
I lay on the ground, my wand held above me.  
  
"Good Lord, I pray that you will forgive me my past sins," I whispered. "I need entrance to heaven."  
  
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.  
  
"I can do this." I exhaled, then breathed in my last breath. "Avada Kedavra."  
  
As it turns out, I was doomed to an eternal death of burning fire in hell. 


End file.
